WB Yeats, my favourite irish blokey (and he has a lot of competition, most of which has the distinct advantage of still being alive) had this theory that each trauma we experience in life helps us to develop as people. Further, he believed we need to experience trauma in order to grow emotionally and to mature fully (just realised it sounds like I know the inner workings of his mind. I should explain I read an essay he wrote on the subject).He thought that our subconscious knew this, and so if we lived a relatively untraumatic life (lets take as an example an intelligent, middle class, white, british girl in the 21st century, parents together and fairly devoted to her, lots of fantastic friends and a pretty easy ride at school – how much trauma can she meet?) then (subconsciously) we invent our own traumas, in order to allow ourselves to develop fully etc. K, that was all pretty technical for me. Juts looking for an explanation as to why I constantly have to have a crush. I get all hung up, it depresses me, I move on. I feel massively relieved and I think ‘I am never again going to allow liking a boy to do that to me’. Then along comes another one. Is it possible that subconsciously I know that there’s not enough trauma in my life, and so I create these traumatic crushes, to give myself a bit of suffering? Or is that ridiculous? Am I just a normal teenage girl, experiencing normal teenage things, and once again overanalysing?
< - >
* the marks of memories forgotten
* wasting emotions, over again
* intentions, and such
* nothing unusual, nothing's changed - just a little older, that's all (damien rice : amie)
* now I understand! It doesn't make sense because it isn't supposed to
|
